In November 2019, I had just returned from Uganda. No one yet knew how a deadly respiratory virus would soon impact the world.
Within the third month of 2020, air travel is curtailed throughout the world. Thousands of people die within days of contracting the deadly virus called Covid-19. Entire cities shut down, including businesses, schools, churches, restaurants, governmental agencies, and everything deemed unessential. We watch news reports with horror as drones fly above streets empty of people and activity in some of America’s largest cities. Hospitals are overcrowded and have too little equipment, too few beds, too few ventilators, and not enough staff. Those hospitalized as well as the elderly and others in care centers languish due to restrictions on visitors.
Grocery store shelves are empty due to trucking problems. Vacations, graduation ceremonies, weddings are all cancelled. National, state, and city parks are all closed. Children’s playground equipment is roped off with yellow caution tape, as if a crime had been committed. People are told to maintain a six-foot distance from others. Elbow bumps replace handshakes or hugs. No congregating in groups. No birthday parties, dates, or dinners out with friends. We are not to enter someone’s home. We are all shocked and fearful as we hear the mounting tallies of infections and deaths. Everyone struggles with the restrictions, closures, and disappointments.
We adjust our expectations. We become accustomed seeing only someone’s eyes as we honor the requirement to cover our noses and mouths with homemade or purchased protective masks. Businesses begin to conduct meetings on virtual apps, and most work from home. Children join teachers and classmates in virtual classrooms on the internet. Restaurants convert their menus to take-out. Churches conduct services online.
Two weeks turns into months, and eventually two years. Everyone begins to characterize this as the new normal. But this new normal is anything but normal. Yet we have become so accustomed to the changes, even welcoming some of them, we don’t yet see the adverse reaction it is having on us. How the closures and isolation are affecting our lives, including my own.
After eighteen years of global travel, I begin to welcome staying closer to home. With most country borders closed, Memory Book outreach, including shipping Memory Books and training of volunteers, halts. Oh, I did some writing and publishing, but it could all be done at home. The passion that once inspired me to forge ahead with Memory Books and Memory Book Clubs as a resource for grieving children seemed to be fading.
I was unaware of how isolation had changed me. But surely, I thought, grief continues to have its effects on the lives of children. Maybe even more so because of the losses incurred by the pandemic restrictions, closures, disappointments, and deaths.
Proud graduates of Hope Vocational & Educational Training Center, Rwanda, Nov. 2022.
By Fall 2022, I reluctantly agree to travel to Rwanda to attend a graduation of students from Hope Vocational and Educational Training Center where Memory Books were introduced several years ago. I say reluctantly because I really didn’t know why I needed to go until I learned that Hope needs a new volunteer or two who are trained in using Memory Books with children. During the graduation ceremony, I look across the courtyard to see two Ugandan friends, Hannah and Richards, speaking to a staff member. Before I travelled to Rwanda, they had requested I come to Uganda, too, when they learned I was making the trip; I had explained it would be difficult to add Uganda to my Rwanda trip. But here they are—in Rwanda, an all-night bus ride from Uganda. Later they told me that they simply wouldn’t have let me come all this way without finding a way to see me. I wept when I realized the extent to which they had gone just to see me.
After dinner with my Ugandan friends, their words kept ruminating through my mind: “Tamara, this is no longer just your ministry. This is God’s ministry. Memory Books will spread over all of Africa. We need you to lead us.”
Upon returning to my hotel room with a lump in my throat, I heard a quiet, familiar voice inside say, “Memory Books is like a fast-moving train. It’s leaving the station. If you can’t keep up, then get out of the way.” What? I think. “Memory Books is like a fast-moving train. If you can’t keep up, get out of the way. Either lead, Tamara, or get out of the way.” The tears now were flowing because I realized I had become spiritually lazy during Covid. And God had sent a willing Hannah and Richards on a bus overnight to roust me from my slumber. I laid awake nearly all night asking God to show me how to lead in this new chapter ahead.
I came to Rwanda to train volunteers, but God had something else in mind. He kept whispering to me, “Either get onboard and lead or get out of the way. Memory Books is like a fast-moving train spreading all over the world.”
Before leaving Rwanda, I requested my Rwandan and Ugandan friends meet me for dinner so they could share what was important to them regarding Memory Books. “This is a New Chapter,” Hannah said.” It is your baby, Tamara. But Memory Books continues to grow since its beginning in 2005, and like a baby outgrowing its clothes, this ministry can no longer function within its original format.”
“A new platform,” said Richards. “We need a framework to implement strategies designed to address the needs of leaders and Memory Book Clubs across continents and around the globe.”
Training and new vision for Memory Books emerged as these leaders gathered in Rwanda, Fall 2022.
The Memory Book leaders from Rwanda added to the conversation. Janet expressed a need for on-going training. Goret added that leaders need networking opportunities. Francis reminded me that this isn’t about a book, but a child.
I looked down to my notes I had written the night before and realized the framework had already begun to emerge:
1) Identify country leaders and build a network through email to facilitate ongoing training and spiritual devotions.
Children jumping for joy at Lahosh Children’s Program, Hope Vocational Training Center, Rwanda, where new facilitators have been trained in the use of Memory Books.
2) Promote networking among country leaders and those they train as facilitators of Memory Book Clubs within their own countries.
3) Organize a Global Conference to be held in 2023 to train, equip, and inspire leaders of Memory Books for Children.
I am reminded of a message given to me by Malcolm St. Clair when Memory Books began in South Africa in 2005: “Better to spread an inch wide and a mile deep, than a mile wide and an inch deep.”
While I am wondering how to build a framework for this new chapter of Memory Books, clearly God has already given me the dimensions. An inch wide and a mile deep. And so YES, I’ve hopped this fast-moving train fueled by God’s faithfulness. God wants children all over the world to know of His unending love for them, and He is using a simple Memory Book shared by those who hear and heed His invitation of “All Aboard!”